HARUSPEX INTERVIEW #1: "BLUEBIRD"

What if I tried a different approach to being a haruspex? What if instead of reading the flight patterns or entrails of birds, I asked them about their feelings? Here are the results from the first interview:

I AM A BIRD. MY FEATHERS ARE BLUE AND ORANGE. I WAS BORN IN AN EGG. FROM AN EGG. I HAVE A BEAK. I USED MY BEAK TO MAKE A HOLE. I LIVED IN A NEST. I COULD ONLY SEE THE SKY OVER THE EDGE OF THE NEST. WERE WE HIGH UP? I DID NOT KNOW I HAD A FEAR OF HEIGHTS YET. I HAD A LIMITED UNDERSTANDING OF SPATIAL CONCEPTS, ONLY SEEING THE SKY. MY FEATHERS WERE NOT GROWN IN. NOW I LIVE IN AN STUDIO APARTMENT. I AM FRIENDLY WITH MY NEIGHBORS. WE SMILE AT EACH OTHER IF WE PASS IN THE HALL. ONCE IN AWHILE WE MEET AT THE LOCAL BAR AND SHARE A BEER. THE BLOODHOUND WHO LIVES DOWN IN 4B IS NEW. SHE JUST MOVED IN ABOUT A MONTH AGO. I ASKED IF SHE NEEDED HELP MOVING IN, AND SHE STARED AT ME FROM UNDERNEATH HER DROOPY EYELIDS, SNIFFED THE AIR IN FRONT OF HER AND SAID "NO, I THINK I'LL MANAGE." I'M THINKING OF MOVING BACK TO THE COUNTRY, MAYBE BUY A HOME, LAY SOME EGGS. I KNOW I WON'T BE ABLE TO GET GOOD WEED AS EASILY, BUT I'M AT A POINT IN MY LIFE WHEN CLEAN AIR AND A CONNECTION TO NATURE ARE JUST REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME.

I don't really see anything prophetic in there. I think that bluebird was pretty
flakey.

Counting Crows

One crow for sorrow, Two crows for joy, Three crows for a girl, Four for a boy, Five crows for silver, Six crows for gold, Seven crows for a secret never to be told.

1. Sorrow. An unhappy event. A change for the worse. Maybe loss or a death.
2. Joy. A surprise. A change for the better. Sometimes the finding of something.
3. Marriage. A celebration. Sometimes the birth of a female child. Othertimes some significant event around a daughter.
   
4. Birth. Usually the birth of a male child. Sometimes a significant event surrounding a son.
5. Silver. Something costly. Usually a positive transaction.
6. Gold. Wealth. Sometimes money. Maybe greed. Occasionally a negative transaction.
7. Something of spiritual significance. Often a secret. In some cases witchcraft, or the performing of sacred rites.
8. Something profound. Death, dying, or a glimpse of Heaven. A life-altering journey or experience.
9. Something sensual. Passion, or forbidden delight. In some versions this is corruption, in others it is closer to temptation.
10. Something extreme. An overwhelming sensation. Something paid in full.
11. Uncertainty. Waiting. Wanting. May be in relation to a spiritual matter.
12. Fulfillment. Riches (though not always of a material sort). A fruitful labor. Something completed. An end to a problem, or the answer to a question.

The practice of Crow Augury has been around for centuries. It is about predicting the future by counting the number of crows present at significant times. Sometimes the direction of their flight is significant, or the time of day at which they are seen. Complex rules have been drawn up by some augurists, while simple rhymes are used by others.

While 'Counting Crows' is a catchy phrase, crow augury may have started off as Magpie augury. The oldest rhymes, including at least one dating to the 1600's, deal with counting magpies rather than crows. The magpie rhyme seems to have been left on European shores, though. In North America, most people who know the rhyme use it in reference to crows.